The experience of three highly educated men who have adoptive children and identify themselves as gays was investigated using semi-structured interviews, which were literally transcribed and submitted to content analysis, resulting in three themes: the wish to become a parent; the construction of a parenthood feeling; secrets and revelations. Results show that wishing to have a child, being able to love it and taking responsibility over it is not related to sexual orientation, nor is restricted to normalization desire; the construction of a parenthood feeling may happen in the daily interaction with the child or since the first moment in which they see it; the relationship with the infant is influenced by the relation with their own sexuality, whether omitting or revealing their sexual orientation.
sexuality; gender; adoption of children by gay men